The Random Yak

Just a brief update (from the weeds) regarding the decision to homeschool Yak the Younger.  We have now almost completed his seventh grade year (two weeks to go…two subjects to finish) and these are the updates you weren’t looking for (But it’s my soap box, and this is what I’m discussing tonight. You want more on Barack O’bomination, go elsewhere.) 

After a year away from the public school environment, each and every person who knows YtY well has commented (without solicitation, thank you) on how much happier and more relaxed he seems now that he studies at home. 

My plan to socialize him by flushing his head in the toilet and stealing his lunch money fell on hard times early in the semester, partially because I leave for work before he and The Random Spouse get up, and partially because I kept forgetting to give him lunch money.  I’ll work harder on that in the coming year.

On the academic front, he’s completed not-quite-one-year of college level introductory Chinese (Mandarin) with a grade of A.  He’s capable of speaking the language, as long as you’re either asking his name or inquiring about whether he or his parents have a son. (He doesn’t.  We do.  Fancy that.) 

Unfortunately, we must report a complete failure to teach him lists of random words and useless phrases like “My sister has a small, pink dog.”

As it happens, YtY finished the year with A’s in all of his classes, except for math, where he’s heading for an A-.  Assuming the remaining weeks of World History go as the past has gone, we can expect an A there too.

My plan to arrange for him to receive at least one thoroughly undeserved ‘C’ due to a gratuitous Christian worldview was foiled by the fact that The Random Spouse and I happen to share that worldview and couldn’t actually find the flaw in his argument.  Clearly we will have to bring in some credentialed teachers to show us the error of our ways.  While they’re at it, they can criticize us for teaching him facts.  As we all know, facts have no place in History.

During the past year, Yak the Younger has shown a marked increase in interest with regard to “adult” topics like government, voting, the news and the way media spins events.  He also wishes to take up Scuba diving and has requested permission to cook dinner on his own. 

The Random Yak and The Random Spouse are fined three credits for breach of the Teen Morality Code.  Everyone knows teenagers don’t want to cook, do nothing but play video games and can’t tell the difference between a law and a lemur (and statistically, 98% of them have never even heard of a lemur, but will try to drive one if you give them the keys.)

We’re fairly pleased with the first year’s efforts.  A few things we’ll try to  improve in the fall, but on the whole the grand experiment has proven a great success – and has also proven that parents can succeed where the public alledgeducation system gets an EPIC FAIL.