The Random Yak

A 30 year-old Boulder woman will appear in court this morning to answer animal cruelty charges related to … the color of her dog.

Joy Douglas, who owns a hair salon in Boulder, Colorado, stains her toy poodle, Cici, a vivid pink “to raise awareness of breast cancer.”  (Funny, I didn’t even know poodles got breast cancer.  Awareness raised…)  Although Ms. Douglas uses organic beet juice rather than more traditional (and potentially toxic) dyes formerly used to color household pets, a Boulder city ordinance forbids “the coloring or dyeing of animals” regardless of method.  As a result, Ms. Douglas faces a $1,000 fine and potential animal cruelty charges for intentionally putting little Cici “in the pink.”

I’m not sure I’ve posted my opinions on colored poodles (and the people who dye them), but this seems a good opportunity to do so – and to distinguish between my opinions about pink poodles (insert rattling cage sounds as the snark struggles for freedom) and my opinions about the law.

First things first.  Anyone who would dye her dog pink (Yes, HER dog.  I’ve seen quite a few pastel pooches in my day, and each and every one belonged to a woman.  That’s not sexism – it’s observable fact.)  probably deserves to have someone tell her exactly how stupid both she and the dog look as a result.  The dog is not an accessory.  It’s not a fashion statement.  In most of these cases, it’s only arguably a dog to begin with, and what little dogginess it had left was largely removed in the dyeing process.  If you want to make a fashion statement, dye your own hair pink.  Or lavender.  Or whatever other color you wanted to inflict on the poor allegedog. 

If God intended poodles to come in pink, I’m fairly confident He would have made them that way.  On the other hand, parrots do come in pink.  And lavender.  And blue.  Poodle doesn’t want a cracker, but maybe Polly should get herself a macaw instead.

All that said, I don’t think it’s the state’s responsibility to prevent (generally elderly) women from engaging in self-ridicule.  Mortifying as the dog no doubt finds its unnatural hue (although, on second thought, it’s a toy poodle - for all I know it would rather be pink) Ms. Douglas attests that the organic vegetable stain doesn’t harm the dog – and as a professional hairstylist with experience in this area, she ought to know.  As long as she’s not placing the diminutive diva in harm’s way or otherwise endangering the physical health of her pet, she should have wide latitude with regard to the dog’s appearance and care. 

The state has an interest in making sure pet owners treat their dogs (cats, horses, birds…) appropriately and don’t engage in cruel or harmful behavior.  The state could – and should – legitimately prohibit the use of toxic or potentially harmful dyes.  Beyond that, however, the city of Boulder seems to be barking up the wrong (colored) tree.  Every day in this country, thousands of unwanted (and some wanted) animals suffer fates that make me shudder.  Dogs of all descriptions die from abuse, neglect and the general apathy of people to self-centered to provide for their pets’ basic needs.  But the city of Boulder would rather prosecute a salon owner who, despite questionable aesthetics, clearly cares for her dog – as well as human beings.  (Remember I said the dog’s pink coat raised awareness for breast cancer?  It also helps raise funds for research to fight breast cancer, and Ms. Douglas gives free haircuts to cancer survivors.) 

Which brings us back to the difference between personal opinion and law.  I may – and generally do – find pink dogs abominable.  I’d rather own no dog than be seen in public with someone else’s pink one – and I’m absolutely going to make snarky comments about any pinkish pooch that crosses my path.  All of which means absolutely nothing when you ask me for a legal opinion on the topic.  The state’s right to regulate owners’ conduct should end with the question: “does the behavior physically harm or endanger the dog.”  If the answer is no, then the dog – and the owner – should remain free to dye themselves any color of the rainbow.

As for the dog’s opinion, that’s between the pooch, the owner and the carpet.

Trackposted to Outside the Beltway, The Pink Flamingo, and Big Dog’s Weblog, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.