The Random Yak

Decorating the Bathroom for Christmas

Filed under: Christmas Alliance,U.S-E.R's,Yak Rants — Random Yak @ 2:06 pm on December 14, 2006

Some things, you never wanted to know you were good at.

I don’t think I everdecorated a bathroom in my life (I know I wouldn’t admit it if I had), but that doesn’t seem to factor into Google’s decision to name me one of the top authorities on bathroom decoration. Because, according to Google and today’s unique, self-educating referrer, I am the #25 authority in the Googleverse onChristmas decorations for the bathroom.

Or, more specifically, on “how to decorate an office bathroom for Christmas.”

Never wanting to letthe public down, permit me to offer the following advice on decorating the office bathroomfor Christmas:

Don’t.

The snark gets loose (and potty humor abounds) below the fold.

You want to put a creche in the reception area? Fine. Santa in the copy room? Go for it. Little lighted reindeer on, under and around your desk? Knock yourself out (just don’t knock anyone else out, that’s an OSHA violation).

But don’t even think of putting Christmas decorations in the bathroom. One does not party in the bathroom. One does not go there for entertainment, frivolity, or even (gasp) to get into the Christmas spirit.And if that makes me a Scrooge I accept the title gladly. Random Yak – Christmas Potty Scrooge.

This alone isWorth a thousand reasonswhy we do NOT decorate the office bathroom for Christmas(but I’ll let it count as one). For the record I will not, repeat not, sit there.

As for ceramic toilet paper elves (if you haven’t seen one, don’t ask), ceramic elves belong on the lawn, where I have at least a sporting chance of *cough* accidentally running them over.

Blinking lights and twinkling stars look great on the front lawn. Ditto trees, houses and the occasional shrubbery. Their bright, chasing colors say “Christmas,” to everyone around. Put them in the office bathroom, however, and suddenly they sound strikingly different. The song isn’t “O Potty Tree,” – with good reason.

No chance. No way. (And while we’re on the subject…am I the only one disturbed by the fact that it’s sold out??) Please don’t replace the Charmin.

I’m all for Christmas decorations. Knock yourself out in your office, the reception area, the filing room and any other place you do business, save this one. Paint the windows, toss some tinsel, set up a tree. Put up the decorative Christmas quilt your wife made (and keep it up all year if you’ve a mind to). Set out Christmas cookies and mull cider all afternoon in the break room.

But please, let therebe peace in the bathroom – and let it begin with thee.

Linked to the Christmas Alliance HQ Homepage

Trackposted to Blue Star Chronicles, Dumb Ox News, and third world county, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.

11 Comments

  1. Blogging peak?…

    One of Gartner Inc.’s top ten predictions for 2007 is that the number of bloggers will level off in the first half of the year. From the Associated Press via Forbes:…

    Trackback by Perri Nelson's Website — December 14, 2006 @ 5:13 pm

  2. Thurday’s ‘Good Stuff’ Roundup…

    Here’s some interesting and/or funny posts from my ‘Good Stuff’ blogroll……

    Trackback by 123beta — December 14, 2006 @ 5:38 pm

  3. Kerry to visit Iraq – what for??….

    Senator John Kerry??s (D-Mass.) botched joke about the U.S. troops in Iraq put a damper on his presidential aspirations, plans to go to Iraq this coming weekend to meet with Soldiers, political leaders and military officials….

    Trackback by The HILL Chronicles — December 14, 2006 @ 6:06 pm

  4. Arlington National Cemetery at Christmas…

    Remembering Fallen Heros at Christmas…

    Trackback by Blue Star Chronicles — December 14, 2006 @ 6:34 pm

  5. Hey Yak,

    I’m so sorry I hadn’t heard about your Christmas Alliance sooner!

    We’ve had our own Coalition going along similar lines! (Maybe a bit more sarcasm and stuff…)

    War on the War on Christmas is the blog, http://waroc.wordpress.com

    I hope you will look through our posts and see if we can somehow cooperate, bring our efforts together, in the remaining shopping days!

    Let’s give peace a chance!

    Ciao,
    D. Ox

    Comment by dumbox — December 14, 2006 @ 6:39 pm

  6. P.s. I’ll add you to our blogroll over there right away!

    Comment by dumbox — December 14, 2006 @ 6:45 pm

  7. Wreaths Across America…

    Our Mission: Remember – Honor – and Teach

    Remember the fallen;

    Honor those who serve;

    Teach our children the value of freedom….

    Trackback by Blue Star Chronicles — December 14, 2006 @ 7:10 pm

  8. This has to be defended?…

    Guess what it is that the MSM can tout all day long, and only on one side of the ledger, but that the President, when he brings up the numbers in the other column, apparently has to defend doing so….

    Trackback by Mark My Words — December 14, 2006 @ 7:35 pm

  9. The Series Overview…

    I recently became a pretty big fan of the South Park Series. Not only is it incredibly funny, grossly politically incorrect, and not at all afraid to cross every line in existence (always a plus with me), it’s also hard……

    Trackback by Conservative Cat — December 14, 2006 @ 9:00 pm

  10. [...] Trackposted to Rightwing Guy, Is It Just Me?, Perri Nelson’s Website, Mark My Words, third world county, The Random Yak, The HILL Chronicles, 123 Beta, Pirate’s Cove, Blue Star Chronicles, Renaissance Blogger, Culturetastic, Dumb Ox News, and Conservative Cat, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe. [...]

    Pingback by Renaissance Blogger » Blog Archive » Blogginess Stuff — December 14, 2006 @ 10:07 pm

  11. You have no idea how relieved *heh* I was upon actually reading your post. The title gave me pause. “Could TRY actually advocate decorating the loo for Xmas?” shuddered I…

    Gladly, no.

    Comment by David — December 17, 2006 @ 7:07 am

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