Tonight, August 8 2006, is official “Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor’s Porch Night”
Now, I know you’re all very excited. I know you’ve studied the educational supplementsand reviewed the photographic evidence of others’ zucchini-sneaking exploits. You know the history and you know the reason for the observance.
You’ve got your sneakers.
You’ve got your digital camera (for recording the moment and posting to your blog, of course).
You’ve got the zucchini.
You’re ready.
But if you’re going to sneak zucchini onto porches tonight, please remember the following simple zucchini-sneaking rules:
- Big dogs don’t like zucchini. (They’re alsonot big onstrange people sneaking onto the porch in the middle of the night.)
- If your neighbor owns a gun collection, he probablyhas enough zucchini already. (Particularly if he leaves a shotgun by the front door “in case of emergency.”)
- Zucchini don’t particularly like being stepped on. (Place the zucchini a safe distance from the door to avoid unnecessary vegetable-related injuries.)
- Zucchini portage is not a defense to trespass. (But it is fun to say “zucchini portage.”)
- Dressing all in blackmakes you look like a ninja, but it’s hard to explain to the police why a ninjaiscarryingzucchini. (Dress like a pirate instead.That’s much easier to explain.)
Remember: it’s only funny until someone loses a zucchini. (And then it’s only funny to the rest of us.)
Linked to the decidedly non-zucchini-related open trackback posts at Adam’s Blog (Answering Machine Mid-Week Open Trackbacks) and Pursuing Holiness (A Sudden Urge to Play Tetris)
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[...] The Random Yak on 08 Aug 2006 at 7:05 pm (Edit) [...]
Pingback by A Sudden Urge to Play Tetris at Pursuing Holiness — August 9, 2006 @ 8:14 am
So, did you do it?? Where are the photos?? I’d do it, but living in a condo complex, we don’t have open porches or even really doorsteps…. plus the gators might get hungry for zucchini and that would be a great surprise to anyone opening up that door….
Comment by MamaDuck — August 9, 2006 @ 10:30 am
Sadly, I had no zucchini and The Random Spouse wasn’t particularly interested in a midnight zucchini run. As it happens, none of the neighbors left zucchini on our porch last night either, proving that Sacramento is non-observant when it comes to vegetables.
Comment by Random Yak — August 9, 2006 @ 12:17 pm
If you are out on offical zucchini portage business, you could be made the victim of an alien zucchini invasion. Best to stay home and protect it. The best way to observe this holiday is to launch your zucchini from an open window. I’ll leave it to your readers to decide on the method of propellant.
Comment by sagerats — August 9, 2006 @ 11:03 pm
Actually, we have a couple of three-foot wooden trebuchets that could probably hurl a small zucchini close to a hundred yards. That’s how far it can throw a large water balloon, anyway, and there’s not that much size difference between the two. Hmm. You might be on to something good.
Comment by Random Yak — August 9, 2006 @ 11:08 pm
[...] There’s a whole lot more of these, including such gems as “National Butterscotch Pudding Day“, “Sneak some zucchini on your neighbor’s porch night” (seriously!), “National Pigs in a Blanket Day” and “Lima Bean Respect Day“. [...]
Pingback by January Is National Hot Tea Month « Tea. Uncomplicated — May 3, 2007 @ 12:08 pm