It has come to my attention thata significant percentage of recent news, commentary and world events has left me gaping, mouth ajar and in serious need of a “system reboot” to clear the obvious logic errors inherent in the reportersand speakers – many of whom seem inclined to report the obvious as though it were actually newsworthy or difficult to grasp.
Case in point: Friday’s Yak of the Week. The former President of Liberia (currently in prison awaiting trialon war crimes charges)is complaining aboutthe fact that prison rules about telephone calls have interfered with his fundraising activities.As though it never occurred to him (orCNN for that matter) that this might just bea logical (not to mention obvious) consequence of being in prison.
Flashing backward tothe family dinner table last week…The Random Spouse mentioned seeing an ad for a new reality television show called “So You Want to be a Superhero” (or something like that).Conversation turned to the fact that reality television (which I hold in relatively low esteem in any case) seems to beheading toward its nadir (faster than a speeding bullet, at that). After a moment’s silence, and completely disregarding the line of conversation, Yak the Younger announced, “If I was a superhero, I know who I’d be.”
Suspecting this would be too good to miss, we overlooked the interruption and asked the question. “Who?”
“OBVIOUSMAN.”
Now, anyone who knows Yak the Younger (and his amazing lifelong capacity to state the obvious at all times and places, regardless of inconvenience or social responsibility) knows just how priceless the statement was.
And anyone who knows me knows that it didn’t take me two seconds to realize just how much the world needs ObviousMan.
Think it over.
Coming soon to a blog near you:
A superhero with the unique capacity to point out disconnection from reality by pointing out…the obvious.Faster than irony. More powerful thana misinformation juggernaut. Capable of leaping misconceptions in a single bound.
It’s…OBVIOUSMAN!
Because sometimes stating the obvious is easier than working around it.
Uh, what’s your point?
Comment by Maniyak — July 24, 2006 @ 11:23 am
I just wish you would quit
watering things down..
and tell it like it is..
lol
This was great!
Come Vote!!!!
Comment by Pet — July 24, 2006 @ 1:20 pm
Well, aside from not using the proper form for the subjunctive mood, I think YtY had a brilliant idea…
(Yeh, yeh: I break, bend, fold and mutilate the language on a regular–and irregular–basis, so who am I to talk?)
Obviousman would have to be faster than a speeding bullet, and alla that, what with Mass Media Podpeople, Political Poltroons, Academia Nut Fruitcakes (and their dumber cousins, pubschool administrators), Loony Left Moonbats and 90% of folks who have drivers licenses… all of whom find the obvious to be matters of wonder, befuddlement and profundity.
Want to give Obviousman a hernia? Pile on the television commercials wholesale. Add a soup?§on of political balderdash and any minor selection from a lecture at any school of education.
Hernia? It’d be anough to herniate a disk in Superman’s back…
Comment by David — July 24, 2006 @ 1:48 pm
Indeed. He’ll be the most overworked superhero of the modern age.
Strangely, I’m looking forward to it.
Comment by Random Yak — July 24, 2006 @ 2:55 pm