The Random Yak

Time-Waster Thursday: Hatetris

Filed under: Frivol,Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 12:21 pm on April 22, 2010

To everyone who’s ever caused me lost sleep, lost peace or lost time:

Here’s your payback.

HATETRIS.

Like tetris, but now it’s personal.  Instead of handing you pieces at random, the Hatetris AI evaluates all your options, and gives you the statistical worst-case-scenario…EVERY TIME.  (Remember how you always thought the tetris AI withheld blocks just when you needed them most?  Now it really does.) In other words…if you try to stack up the left side while you wait for that stick to drop and fill the hole on the right…it literally never will.  Why? Because unlike Tetris, which you only thought wanted you to fail, Hatetris does want you to fail.  In fact, it’s designed to ensure that eventually (and usually sooner rather than later) you will.

Ask not for whom the failboat sails.  It sails for thee.

The Nearly Triumphant Return of Time-Waster Wednesday: Progress Wars

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 1:30 pm on March 17, 2010

(Apologies in advance to the non-gamers among you.  This one is probably only funny if you understand what is meant by “rep grind” … and fortunately, only humiliating if you have to admit you’re revered or higher with Brood of Nozdormu.)

It’s Wednesday afternoon.  You need something to do.

I give you:  Progress Wars.  The online video game that calls it like it really is.  Gone are the distracting graphics, the confusing quest text, and the need for problem solving abilities or that pesky high-end gear.

Progress Wars.  For those who live for the grind.

You’ll thank me when it’s over.

For the record:

1.  This is only a “near triumphant return” because I did not finish the game.

2.  The best mission name I encountered was: ” Plunder enchanted motorcycle hunter stranglers wielding invisible bandyclefs.”  (A mission so awesome I didn’t even understand what I was doing…much like half of Northrend.) “Mission: Ruffle Eggplant” was a close second.  It took a while to complete, probably because I didn’t have any idea eggplants could be ruffled.

3.  How can you not love a game that declares itself the ultimate expression of “being better than your friends at filling progress bars”?

Yes, I’m a gamer geek.  But if you spend more than five minutes on that website (and statistically, 57% of the people who read this site will)…newsflash…so are you.

Time-Waster Wednesday: Demolition City

Filed under: Just Yaks,Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 1:06 pm on November 11, 2009

Warning: the contents of this post are almost certainly guaranteed to enjoyably take up an inordinate amount of time you will never get back.

Welcome to the newly-resurrected Time-Waster Wednesday.  I’d forgotten this little blogging gem…and it would have stayed forgotten but for the fact that I just wasted half an hour of my own limited existence scrubbing spammer garbage links off the walls in the archives for November 2006.  (Which, as always, leaves me in an indescribable mood.  At least, indescribable without the use-of-words-we-don’t-print-here.)

And so, in the interest of totally wrecking someone else’s day too, permit me to offer the Return of Time-Waster Wednesday: Spanning the ‘Net to bring you the best in mindless entertainment of little social, political or intellectual value. (Read: Things You Will Actually Do When You Should Be Working.)

Today’s offering:

Demolition City

The rules are simple:  “Put the dynamite in place and blow up the building.”  Extra points for taking the structure down with minimal collateral damage.  (But as I.T. Yak points out…where’s the fun in that?)

Enjoy.

After all, you weren’t really planning to work today, were you?

Time-Waster Wednesday: World Map Game

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 3:43 pm on December 12, 2007

I completed level 6.  How far can you get?

How Well Do You Know Your World Game

Warning: if you don’t know your geography … prepare for a FAIL!

Time-Waster Wednesday: Penguin Swing

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 2:23 pm on July 18, 2007

Most of us may have seen this via e-mail at one point or another, but some things never get old (particularly when you’re having that “Smack a Penguin” kind of day…).

Submitted for your approval: Penguin Swing.

Penguin-punting for distance: Click to release the penguin. Click again to swing.

Enjoy.


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Time-Waster Wednesday: The Map Game

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 11:20 am on July 11, 2007

Today’s offering: geography with a twist.

The Map Game.

21 random states will drop into the side panel, one at a time. Click and drag them to the appropriate places on the map as fast as you can. Yes, it’s timed.More addictive than you might think.

Enjoy.

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Time-Waster Wednesday: Snakes on a Game!

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 10:32 am on June 27, 2007

It was only a matter of time….

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Arrow keys control the snake. Pick up the little loose pieces to add to your score -as well asthe length of your snake. (It’s a variation on SNAFU, for those old – and geeky – enough to remember.)

Enjoy.


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Time-Waster Wednesday: Stack Blocks

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 9:27 am on June 20, 2007

Today’s Offering:

Stacking Blocks.

About the right speed for someone recovering from the flu. Or anyone else, for that matter. Works like this: Click to place the blocks in the stacks (you can place blocks anywhere, not just at the top). Mouse left or right to swap the colored blocks from side to side before placement. Stack three of the same colorand they’lldisappear.

Enjoy.


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Time Waster Wednesday: (And OTP)

Filed under: Random Linkfests,Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 9:04 am on June 13, 2007

Today’s Time-Waster Wednesday:

Touch the Bubbles.

An easy one, for a change. Use the mouse to touch the bubbles before they hit the wall. (Note: I said it’s easy, but it’s not simple for long.)

This is also your Wednesday OTP and linkfest. Link and trackback and I’ll hardlink you in as I have time.

Promoted at the Wednesday Haiku Linkfest post at

Linkfest Haven, the Blogger's Oasis


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Time-Waster Wednesday: Bubble Tanks

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 11:32 am on June 6, 2007

Today’s Time Waster:

Bubble Tanks

Use the W-A-S-D keys to drive the tank. Use the mouseto aim and fire. Destroying enemy tanks releases bubbles you can use to strengthen your own bubble tank.

Enjoy.

Time-Waster Wednesday: IndestructoTank

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 9:41 am on May 30, 2007


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Time-Waster Wednesday: Parking Perfection

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 10:27 am on May 23, 2007

Today’s offering is sure to be easy.

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Park the car in the space.

No problem, right?

Right.

Let me know how that works out for you.

Time Waster Wednesday: Tower Defense

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 11:51 am on May 16, 2007

Build the towers.

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Kiss your workday goodbye.

Time Waster Wednesday: Kittenwar

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 6:24 am on May 2, 2007

It’s a game…it’s kittens….it’s…KITTENWAR.

Click the cuter kitten to decide the war and begin a new one. Deceptively simple – and harder to stop than you might think. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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Time-Waster Wednesday: Boomshine

Filed under: Time Waster Wednesday — Random Yak @ 9:32 am on April 4, 2007

Today’s offering:

Boomshine.

Click one dot. It explodes, blowing up other dots. If you manage to take out enough, you progress to the next level. Deceptively simple. Impossible to quit.

Enjoy.


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